Susan's Scribblings the Blog

A writer from the Philadelphia area shares the week online.
Susan's Scribblings the Blog
  • Who the Heck is Kayewer?
  • Monthly Archives: September 2024

    • Sep(tic)tember

      Posted at 3:29 pm by kayewer, on September 28, 2024

      I’m an old lady with quite a few bum days behind me, but this past month has to be right up there with the most lengthy and depressing I have ever experienced.

      It started right in with my workload on the first workday of the month, with phones ringing off the hook and all hands on deck to try and work through them. It was bad enough that, if our workers’ kids and pets could answer phone calls, we would have loved to have them onboard. Even though our services are available 24 hours, it seems people have mental blinders on and never call when it’s quieter, like on weekends or during off-peak hours. The holiday, start of school and the end of summer alternative job requirements (like taking your laptop to the shore) all came together for a perfect storm.

      This need for every person on the phones resulted in the email forum becoming backed up with questions, comments and vitriol all morning, so I handled them in the afternoon, putting in extra hours which I would make up by leaving early on Friday. It was a fortunate alternative to overtime pay, since I was ready to crawl into a coffin by noon that day anyway.

      Everybody was getting back into their fall, winter and spring routines, so extracurricular activities, or anything resembling recreation, was put on hold for most parents. I had volunteered to handle some optional after-work tasks, which I can do because I don’t have kids. Those activities are normally fun distractions, but this month brought as few participants than I had ever seen when other folks ran them. I blame it on September; otherwise I would have to believe that nobody likes to attend when I lead.

      The cemetery was quiet–meaning no living folks were present–when I went to visit my parents with flowers on their anniversary. The birds were silent, and the geese were merrily pooping while filling up on more grass to poop out some time later. That entire day went by without contact with another living human being. In fact, there were a lot of days like that in September.

      One of my own personal group meetings brought three people out to join me, for whom I am most grateful. It seems nobody keeps a perpetual calendar notice on their cellphones, so folks forgot. We still had a great discussion, and we nearly closed down the place (their hours are only until 9:00 PM).

      Television was pre-new season, so nothing much was on to provide me with any background noise while I worked. I think I turned it on half a dozen times in the past month. I stopped watching the news because it stirs too much emotion, gave up on “Jeopardy” and “Wheel of Fortune” because they had become less challenging and more of a nuisance. There is a series of music channels available, but the visuals with their trivia and fun facts about the featured artists are distracting while I’m trying to work. My satellite service wants to charge me for delivery to a radio, which I would also need to buy. No thank you.

      Went to the lab to bleed into a tube or four, and the results showed a few high numbers, but the doctor told me I’m fine. Doctor knows best. The sleep study I underwent resulted in a referral (more on that to come, once that happens). I had a chance to jump the line into an earlier appointment, but it’s for the first of October, which will be just as busy as the first of September after the holiday weekend, so I turned that chance down. My job needs me. Or I need my job. Or both.

      Meanwhile, as I look into the possibility of joining a gym, I realize that physical fit farms are way scarier than they’re made out to be. The fit folks rip into the people who are trying to get in shape, which discourages people from getting into shape just so the fit folks can rip into them. The people who use the equipment don’t always treat the devices as they should. People sweat, they don’t put any underwear between their nethers and the surfaces they sit on in just their stretchy workout clothes, because that would not look fashionable. It’s a godforsaken germ paradise waiting for a fresh body to populate upon.

      The other day I needed to explain to somebody how a year works, and they argued with me about it. You see, the individual was, like most cheap-minded people these days, looking to snag a discount just like they got between 2020 and 2023. Who cares if the place goes out of business, as long as one of their last acts was to give you a discount that put a heavier financial burden on the very industry you are actually supposed to be paying money to so they can be reliable when you need them. Anyway, the person was soon to attain a milestone, which would avail them of a discount. By soon, I mean they were in year nine of a ten-year anniversary. The person, however, was determined to convince me that year nine counts as year ten. I had to explain to an elder–whom I as a Boomer was raised to respect–that a person is not one year old at birth; one must go through 365 days to attain the age of one year, and so they must complete year ten to be eligible for the discount. Of course, the clapback was then, “So, you’re admitting that you are refusing to help me.” Where is Scott Seiss the “Ikea guy,” whose snarky customer service videos are a funny look into what some employees wish they could say? I could use his advice. I don’t know if the person is going to throw a few decades of loyalty down the drain because they can’t wait one year more or not, but I did my best to encourage the person to stick it out because I’m told the perks are worth it. But hey, let me bear the burden of watching you shoot yourself in the foot.

      I guess that’s my problem: I care too much. I show up and suit up and take the absentees and abuse and quiet in stride because that is my lot in life. This month did weigh a bit heavier than usual, just because it was so devoid of positivity.

      Maybe October will be better.

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      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged life, mental-health, work
    • For Charlotte

      Posted at 3:23 pm by kayewer, on September 21, 2024

      I was ready to post one of my usual stories about life, but just before I started to log in, a pop-up stopped me short. My heart, which has been chipped away at for a good fifty years, lost another tiny piece when I clicked on and read the article.

      An Australian girl named Charlotte has been murdered by proxy. Her wonderful mother, Kelly, would not agree with me, and I will deal with the guilt of telling this in my own way because she has a bigger heart than I at this moment (which I will explain later).

      Charlotte was twelve years old. Twelve, and at that brief gap of development between youngster and teenager when life is just beginning to make some sense, the unfairness of the world has entered the subconscious, and the future is a tangible thing both awesome and terrifying. She was a year 7 student at a Sydney private school–Santa Sabina College in Strathfield–and had been bullied for at least two years. The most recent event was “investigated,” and the girls involved allegedly denied it. Of course they would, because they wanted to do it again, and again.

      One day from the past, recently brought to light, found another girl confronting a crying Charlotte in the girls’ restroom. The school simply called Kelly to come pick her up. We can’t have somebody exhibiting signs of heartbreak or vulnerability in a school setting, now can we.

      Kelly contacted a local radio host, Ben Fordham from G2B breakfast show. “‘These issues cannot be swept under the carpet. I will not let my daughter’s memory be swept under the carpet either. How many more children need to lose their lives before they get it? How many parents need to feel the pain of never being able to pick up their child from school again before they get it? We’re broken forever.”

      At the same time, she also said something I wish I could right now. “Please, I must stress and I beg, I do not wish any little girls to feel responsible for this. I don’t want any other mum not being able to wake up their child in the morning. They are also just little girls so they don’t understand. Charlotte made a mistake on a moment of grief, she did not meant to do this, she did not understand.”

      Every child, whether sports star, shop ace or A+ academic genius, needs to understand. They need to be responsible. What do you prefer, that they cheer or hold a party at the gravesite? They might as well, for all the attention the adults are paying to what happened.

      I would like to talk to any of these so-called faculties who sweep bullying under the rug. You are also sweeping a CHILD under a rug when you ignore what is happening. You are also encouraging criminal behavior among your students, because once they are allowed to torment a victim who doesn’t matter to you, there is no reason for that human being to matter to them. You are permitting torture, endorsing participation in discrimination and supremacy mindsets, and you turn the other way when a victim dies!

      I have already gone over this with another local young woman who died at school from bullying (see “Felicia’s Story” from November 04, 2023). Every time it happens, it’s as if these ignorant bullies and suit-wearing conference table dwellers pull out pieces of my heart with pliers. This is a CRIME and an embarrassment to our society that we feel bullying is not something that needs to be treated as an affront to dignity and worthy of strict punishment, including banishment from the public and private school system, suspension, community service, fines and even public apology.

      Yes, some of these bullying victims retaliate, and yet we seem surprised by that. Victims are supposed to stay quiet and take it. I haven’t seen any evidence otherwise.

      So the bullies won’t be charged with anything, and we will see another article pop up in another news feed on social media. We accept it, we do nothing about it, and we don’t care, obviously.

      Shame on us all.

      Source: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13853949/Heartbreaking-text-Australian-girl-sent-taking-life-dad-claims-school-huge-mistake.html?ito=push-notification&ci=Aw6V2hP5xb&cri=L9-evVOMAX&si=kKwv_EZzmFnV&xi=cfa9e0dc-f75b-4549-8d0b-35aba9913c54&ai=13853949

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      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged bullying, bullying suicides
    • Sleepytime

      Posted at 4:11 pm by kayewer, on September 14, 2024

      Getting a good night’s sleep is one of the few things everybody agrees is essential to our wellbeing. Estimates, unfortunately, say that only about two-thirds of people surveyed claim to get at least seven hours of healthy sleep. The rest of us deal with the difficulties associated with unpredictable daily schedules, travel across time zones, stress, and other factors which can affect our ability to conk out.

      Disorders such as insomnia (inability to sleep), sleep apnea (sleep interrupted by poor breathing), or other causes such as restless legs, heart problems, lung disease and chronic pain can contribute to bad sleep. Needing to use the bathroom during the night wakes us up, while too much caffeine may keep us up. Medications can interfere with nodding off; sometimes the cause isn’t as obvious.

      My doctor knew I had sleep issues, so he ordered a sleep study for me. Insurance covers part of the expense, but I did write a check for some of the cost because my golden years will thank me for it later. The objective is to observe a normal evening and record what may interfere with healthy downtime. This meant that I went to a sleep center for observation overnight.

      The sleep center resembles a cross between a hospital ward and a hotel. My room contained a queen sized bed with two pillows of various resilience, a television, lamp, chair and locker. I was invited to bring my own pillow, but I had a brand new one at home, so I declined and opted for what was offered.

      My normal evening routine doesn’t include TV in bed or late night snacking. It was easy for me to go into my pre-sleep routine for the study. After changing into comfortable pajamas, a technician applied rubbing alcohol and an adhesive paste to parts of my scalp (which needed to be clean and free of any conditioner or hairspray: also known as bed head), then attached monitors to my skin, as well as on my legs, head, chin, by my eyes and, most notably, airway probes inside my nose and bands around my chest and abdomen. These would pick up brainwave activity, leg and mouth movement (including teeth grinding), disruptions in breathing and blinking.

      The tech doused the lights–it was around 11 PM–and had me remotely perform some breathing and movement tasks for her and the camera to pick up. I was recorded all night under special lighting, similar to those hidden camera themed horror movies like Paranormal Activity.

      No ghosts were mentioned as having appeared in my study.

      The first thought most people have is, “How the heck can anybody sleep with all those wires all over your head?” Amazingly, I fell asleep at, what I think was, rather close to my usual time. I was awakened once when my nostril rejected the probe, but the end of the study came quickly at 6:00 AM when the tech put me through some more tasks, then the lights came on like a lightning storm and I was allowed to dress and go home.

      The results won’t be in for about two weeks, but in the meantime I’m continuing to sleep in my usual bed at my usual time without any wires.

      And no TV.

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    • It’s Curtains: The Fall of Drapes

      Posted at 3:05 pm by kayewer, on September 7, 2024

      I have been on a one-person campaign to update my sun porch and turn it into an office space. It may be the second most expensive thing I will do in my childhood home (the first will be electrical in nature). The room is not insulated; in fact, a doofus of a roof installer had an infamous argument with my father some three decades ago by calling it a “shed” so he didn’t need to put shingles on it. There are three other houses within eyesight built exactly the same way to refute that insult. But I digress. It means I may need to either put out for interior wall insulation or use a space regulating system (air in summer, heat in winter), but I think it will be wonderful to have that part of the house in a usable condition again.

      One of my most recent projects involved a handyman putting up new shades, which was step one of the window treatment process. Step two was putting up new curtains, which I did (and put a valance up wrong side in, but that’s another digression). Step three is in progress and involves taking down the old curtains, which have been up since we moved in. Yes, they were that good and that sturdy that we didn’t need to replace them. They’re a neutral color and were insulated themselves, so their replacements, if I go that route, would be the same.

      These drapes were hung with hooks which resemble an EKG readout, inserted into a series of metal tabs with holes and run with ropes to open and close. The new ones will likely be rings and poles and operated manually, if I elect to close them at all. The sun comes in much of the day in summer, so the area is toasty and perfect for plants. Winter will be a different story, which I will improve upon as I go.

      Over last weekend I put together another bookshelf for that room and moved it in. A couple of days later, one of the window shades popped out and fell. Either the handyman didn’t click it into place properly, or my house is haunted. Both are possible. Last week a picture I hung, using those wonderful adhesive strips with three letters in their brand name, popped off the wall and landed on my head before settling in my lap. Fortunately the picture weighs nearly nothing. I remounted it with a hanger that takes up to eight pounds, so we’ll see if a poltergeist is behind the incidents or not.

      As I remounted the shade, I also took down another curtain. This involved popping each hook from the bracket while navigating nearly eighty inches of stiff fabric and standing precariously on a ladder. Some of you would say, “Stay off that ladder at your age,” but doing these little tasks are what will keep me going until I reach another “at your age.” One at a time is part of the key to success, and not pushing too hard past one’s limitations.

      The curtains must come down before shifting any more furniture, since some of it will go into the corners where the drapes are, well, draped. The project is half finished, and once completed, I can have the handyman measure and mount the new curtains if I get them. Move the other pieces around, assemble my L-shaped computer desk, have an electrician check for voltage safety, and I can then hook up my work and personal gear and move in.

      By that time, I also expect to be a little more broke, but when the curtain closes on one part of life, it opens on a new one.

      Hopefully well insulated.

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