The summer has officially begun. Yesterday in my region, all the schools ended with graduations galore, which meant that today was a heavy traffic day, as countless families left home for their choice of vacation spots. This has been the first summer since 2020 that feels like normal again, so there is sure to be some craziness going around. Here are some observations from somebody who has experienced these madcap summers for a few decades.
Everybody needs to relieve themselves, so when you’re in a new place and experiencing new things, this becomes an issue for you as the tourist and the people who live full-time where you’re vacationing. When you’re at the shore with Fido on a walk and come across homes with nicely manicured lawns, keep a poo retrieval device with you and don’t let your poopsie poop on that nice lawn; try the curb instead.
Also, when you go to the beach, don’t pee in the ocean. Go before you leave your temporary lodging.
Don’t feed the birds: it encourages them to be pests. Let seagulls eat what seagulls eat in the wild, not boardwalk food.
The containers and other items used to hold or transport your food are your responsibility from the moment you purchase the food item until it is placed in a proper disposal area. This is an unspoken term and condition of buying food on the go, and nobody is going to make fun of you if you carry an empty paper plate for a hundred yards before finding a trash container. Believe me: I’ve never seen anybody get trash shamed. Don’t drop stuff on the ground; it encourages seagulls.
Use sunscreen. Skin cancer is not something you want to endure. Leave being brown- or red-skinned to those whose heritage gives them the beauty of that privilege. Be your pale, wonderful self, but protected with SPF 30 or better.
Cleaning up the beach or campground is indeed somebody else’s job, and that somebody else is you. If you’ve established good habits of cleaning up after yourselves at home, this shouldn’t be an issue elsewhere.
If you raise an eyebrow when you see yourself in the mirror, the thoughts of other people around you if you go out that way will be much more embarrassing. Fix it before you tip out the door.
I have never understood the social rules which say that the only acceptable hair on humans is on the head or eyebrows, and all other bodily hair is repulsive. Although it’s true that some folks out there–men in particular–may be wildly hirsute, unless you truly look as if the Michelin tire man was genetically crossed with a Yeti, and the result is decidedly inhuman, who among us can truly judge?
Remember the sun damage rule of thumb and stay away from the risk of skin cancer by being extra cautious between 10:00 AM and 3:00 PM, when the sun does the most damage.
Be careful drinking milk in hot weather, and don’t lock your knees when standing. This is a lesson I learned during military training. This helps you avoid passing out.
Officials at the parks and beaches, such as lifeguards and rangers, have a ton of good advice for visitors. Stop and learn something from them and obey their instructions.
Ice cream is tougher to eat slowly in humid weather. Avoid disaster and order a small.
If somebody produces a way to avoid pizza drooping, you’ll save the world a lot of damaged clothing. Even John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever had to deal with a bit of floppy double-stacked goodness (I’m sure he ate them backwards to avoid the problem).
Tipping at vacation resorts is always welcome, and often helps short-funded people stay healthy and well-fed in the off-season. Teenagers also get college fund money for sundries this way.
If you check your car before leaving on vacation, you’ll save a ton of grief. A quick inspection at your dealership or car care center such as at AAA branches, can make sure your SUV won’t become SOL.
Always pack one more pair of underwear than the length of your stay, and one less pair of shoes. Slip some adhesive bandages and diarrhea medication in with your makeup or toiletries.
Remember those post-visit sheets from your physician? If you can, take a photo of the medication list and store it on your cell for emergencies. In the absence of that, if you use a mail-order pharmacy, try getting a list from there, or have your local one print your med list up for you.
I could go on, but this is a good stopping point. I hope everybody has a safe and happy summer. It only lasts so long (around ninety days, as most radio stations and marathon-running networks will remind you), so make it last in your memory for all good reasons.
Susan's Scribblings the Blog 