My mother called me “kid” this morning, and though it may seem jocular, it has a sinister meaning in her side of our family. One of my great grandparents referred to my mother as “the kid” in a not-so-nice way. Back then, kids were not treated as kindly, either.
Of course my mother was not herself when she said this to me. It’s all part of being elderly and on changing medications, and of having bad mornings when things don’t seem right in one’s head upon awakening. When you’re a senior and have decades of mental files in a brain which is not as good at keeping them filed and orderly, some of the strangest memories turn up at unusual times. A complete song came to her mind later this morning; one I had not heard before. Same person, different hour of the day.
Of all the things we wonder about and study, the mind is still a huge mystery. Why somebody goes on a rampage and kills, or shuts down and loses touch with life, are still mysteries, and not only for older adults. The brain is more complex than any computer, and more vulnerable than we care to admit. This is why many people don’t understand voluntary chemical dependency on cigarettes or substances (vaping, drugs, alcohol). Nobody would wake up saying, “I think I’ll start a habit which will create a burden on my life,” but it happens every day. And it stays, and torments, and destroys.
I realize that we thrive on rewards, regardless of how they may be obtained. Rewards come from reactions within the brain which compel us to find the same feelings again. With problems such as substance abuse or gambling, rewards become a chronic obsession. It may be a sick thrill to know that somebody is going to be hurt because you arranged for it to happen, but it’s the reward that matters, not how it is obtained. That may be the key to any kind of adult abuse of children. It needs to be studied and addressed.
As for the elderly and the tendency to come up with random thoughts during mental spring cleaning, I passed off the “kid” reference, but I hope that by the time I am at an age with the mind supposedly “starts to go,” I will be able to read the results of a study and know why, and be able to do something about it.
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