I think there is a plot out there to destroy brick and mortar retail stores. Either that, or I have a “Don’t Serve Me” sign stuck to my back. Nobody helps me in a store, but an invisible source on a website takes my money easily (well, somewhat). Which all goes back to my comments awhile ago that we, as human beings, can’t stand each other anymore. Either that, or we have suddenly become Planet Stepford (if you are scratching your head, look it up: a movie called the Stepford Wives from 1975), and I’ve suddenly realized that I’m not one of them.
I have spent over two weeks trying to buy a cell phone. Model one was very low-tech, so I felt inclined to buy the more expensive model two, but that model was out of stock. The sales associate (their gender neutral title these days) said that his girlfriend’s friend happened to work at the one store that still had one in stock, but they would get it for me. Days passed and I heard nothing, so I played phone tag; the associate called me back to say that a new model was coming in which would be better and easy to get because he was expecting it the next day. Of course it cost half again what I intended to pay for model two. Fine, I said. He’ll call me, he said.
Yes, I’m still waiting for that call, as I hold on to my Luddite model which is not supported anymore and could die at any moment. No, I am not going to buy an IPhone, which apparently is well stocked because they buy them.
I have found that the sales associates in Best Buy follow a Murphy’s law of customer service: whatever department I’m in, that’s the one where nobody is working.
I was at Wegman’s to buy some healthy vegetables and happened to spot a Pepperidge Farm layer cake on sale. The self-serve lines were jammed, so the staffer there (another gender neutral job title) sent me to Customer Service to have my purchases handled. The associate loaded the box into a plastic bag upside down; fortunately the icing inside was frozen enough that no residue was left on the roof of the box. I guess that was their way of scolding me for ruining my wonder vegetarian grocery shopping experience with a cake that’s bad for you.
My online purchases this week, however, went without a hitch. One of these days I’ll have to click on the chat feature and see how interacting with a live person is when we don’t have to stand a few feet from each other. I just hope they’re not one of them.
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