I don’t own an Apple product. Not an IPod, IPhone, computer, watch or anything else they might have on the market. Still I am surrounded by Apple stuff every day, and Apple users have laughed at me.
I’m not buying any Apple products.
The newest commercials feature exquisite photos taken by–I assume–normal people using their IPhone cameras. I have never figured out how to use the camera on my Windows phone, but I carry a real pocket camera around anyway, so it doesn’t matter.
Why does a phone need a camera, anyway? It eats up battery time and storage space. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear the over-the-top soggy and rainy weather we’ve had lately is due to too much stuff stored in that infamous cloud. Yes I know; it’s just a figure of speech, but if you can’t see where it’s stored, does it still exist? And what happens if somebody finds your cloud? Gives that Rolling Stones tune a new meaning, doesn’t it?
Hey you, get out of my cloud storage!!
Anyway, now Apple has a watch that you must get custom fitted and comes with an electronic personal trainer that eggs you on to bigger and more exhausting feats of daily exercise. About two years ago, my company gave out free pedometers, so I keep the battery fresh in that little guy, and it counts my steps just fine. Two LED indicators are missing, but I can tell an 8 from a backwards 3, so it doesn’t matter.
I see lines of people in Apple stores, and the workers are exhausted. My bosses joke with me that nobody is in line at the Windows store. Good. I can get service immediately.
When the day comes when all the Apple products go on the fritz, I’ll come charging in on my white horse with my Windows all ready to go, and then you’ll all be sorry.
Don’t throw Apples at my Windows: I’ll make applesauce.