Susan's Scribblings the Blog

A writer from the Philadelphia area shares the week online.
Susan's Scribblings the Blog
  • Who the Heck is Kayewer?
  • Monthly Archives: June 2010

    • Blood, Sweat and Cheers

      Posted at 1:20 am by kayewer, on June 28, 2010

      It’s tough to work on a book with other people, especially if they’re scattered all over the place and never have more than a few hours each month to get anything done.  For the past few months, I’ve been working with some fellow writers to put out an anthology.  A project like this takes lots of time, dedication to the craft of actually writing something meaningful down, an anal retentive eye for accuracy, loss of sleep and a skinny wallet.  None of us is Stephen King or Stephenie Meyer, so even though those great best-selling authors work hard, we work another kind of hard and without the backing of an agent or a waiting list of anxious fans.

      We’ve pumped out pages of manuscripts.  We’ve picked the pages clean of passive sentences, and reviewed them over and over until our eyes are dry.  Now the time has come for the details outside the manuscript, such as what will go on the back cover and in the spaces between each writer’s manuscript.  We each must do a bio page in which we condense our writing-related accomplishments into a short paragraph or four.  It’s taking longer than we anticipated.

      Along with the trauma of having to speak well of oneself (which I covered in a prior blog about performance reviews), this exercise requires a trip back in time to when none of us came even close to being true writers (which we may still not be now).  That is hard.

      I remember back in elementary school when a teacher told me that I had been selected to go to an advanced writing workshop at the high school.  They made it sound like either a death sentence or the worst piece of news they could break to me.  I was ecstatic at the news, and the workshop was (in my mind) a validation of my talent.  In a place where a select few adults chose the select few children, this meant something.  The way they communicated it to me, though, I realized that it didn’t mean I was special.  Of course not.  I was a kid, and there were great authors out there well beyond their tween years.

      Realistically, writers are a special breed.  Not many become Stephen King or Stephenie Meyer, and the few spots open for other good craftspeople are tough to get into.  When it comes to talking about myself as a writer, I think about how that faculty member told me the news that I was chosen for something related to writing.  I then take a deep breath, start tackling those non-passive sentences, and review them until my eyes are dry.

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    • Mystery Post Challenge

      Posted at 1:15 am by kayewer, on June 20, 2010

      Every once in awhile my mind works in funny ways.  It’s a writing thing.  I decided to put a small piece of an idea I had for an unusual type of storytelling here for readers to look at.  Try your hand at the following:

      Ape rises a furred ford a reed or hook candy sigh ford this intense.

      If you figure it out, pat yourself on the back for finding something different on an Internet blog, and pass it on to your friends to try.  A good command of English helps, and don’t be afraid of public speaking.  Hope it’s interesting.  If not, just remember that most experiments are touch and go anyway, so there is always room for improvement.

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    • Sandal Booty

      Posted at 2:28 am by kayewer, on June 13, 2010

      Once the temperature climbs above 60 degrees, it seems the summer clothing starts coming out.  Considering the winter we’ve just been through, it’s not surprising that folks want to dress down and disown anything remotely resembling clothing designed for warmth.

      Unfortunately, this also means that ugly sandals come out in droves, and by the pair, no less.

      I won’t even go into detail about those dreadful gladiator look sandals that lace above the ankle.  And huarches have to be the most bizarre excuse for footwear I’ve ever seen.

      At work, the policy allows for sandals but still is business casual.  Defining it is a three-month challenge which ends unresolved just in time for the summer dress code to end in September.  Generally business persons are not supposed to wear anything that would be used on the beach, but then the shoe manufacturers have brought out black patent sandals with thong toes, and the line in that beach sand is drawn yet again.  I’ve yet to see a worker sent home because of a fashion mistake, but such faux pas happen daily somewhere in cubicle land, which is why smart people testing the policy waters bring a backup pair of footwear.

      I never understood why people like to flog the bottoms of their feet with flip flops.  Every step brings a slap of rubber, and in a crowd the hundreds of slaps start sounding like a mass tap-a-thon from a Broadway musical

      Besides the red soles resulting from shoe self-flagellation, sandals tend to irritate the feet in at least one spot (and it seems the exclusive bane of women sandal wearers).  A woman’s feet suffer more degradation in summer than in a stiletto pair of Manolos.  Along with the requisite nail polish and weekly (or more) mani/pedi rituals, bandages and cotton balls are stuck on blisters between toes, callous files get worn down to nothing, and Dr. Scholl stock goes through the roof.

      The parade of bare feet in summer is amusing for the casual observer.  Even the ugliest toes are put in display (attached to feet with distinct tan lines).  The fact that feet are exposed to more germs on the ground than ever doesn’t seem to matter (though logically more foot exposure should mean more bathing).

      The only bare feet I have no issue with are kids’ adorable toes.  Youngsters have nice feet, and nobody has to paint their toenails or squeeze them into orthopedic nightmares with thong toes.  It seems adulthood demands more pain in the name of fashion, which is why I always watch the stock market to see how Dr. Scholl is doing to determine if the fashi0n trends are just right for decent sandal buying.

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    • Potty Humor

      Posted at 2:48 am by kayewer, on June 6, 2010

      It seems that everybody in the past week has been talking about toilets.  My favorite columnist Lisa Scottoline did a piece about automated restrooms that made me laugh so hard I bust a seam.  At the office, the maintenance staff have been having difficulties with the thin but must-have seat covers.  Sometimes the paper is so thin, not only does it stick to you in an inconvenient place, but you never seem to get all of it peeled off once it has a hold on you.

      People were talking about the floors (never clean enough, even after they’ve just been mopped), the flushing mechanisms (an almost invisible rubber coated button) and the fact that the seats jiggle around because they’re not secured very well.  We can send a man to the moon, but try to secure a toilet seat in a public restroom.

      The office was so busy this past week, I think everybody was grateful just for the chance to take a bio break, complaints notwithstanding.

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