It’s a pain in the neck at my age to always be behind the times and unable to catch up. First it was microwaves, and then IPhones; now it’s Twitter. As if instant messaging on IPhones isn’t cool enough, or Facebook or MySpace don’t quite cut it anymore, now one has to log all of their activities into cyberspace on some sort of mega-public cyberspace diary.
Sorry. My life isn’t that interesting to warrant a bit of space on Twitter.
I remember when I sent my first text message ever: I used a privilege granted to me by my using an AT&T cellphone (which, by the way, is two years old) and voted on Dancing With the Stars, which meant I texted one word: “Vote.” I don’t think that would raise an eyebrow on Twitter, but it was an accomplishment for me. I still text “vote” every season. That’s about it.
When would I log in my life story anyway? I already have to account to my boss for my workweek. That’s tough to do, because by the time I come up for air after three hours straight staring at a cubicle corner highlighted by a dual screen computer filled with things to be done, I’m more ready to take a bio break than try to explain what functions I just performed.
Watchdog groups claim that a large chunk of the average workday is taken up by things not related to performing the job; I’m sure Twitter has contributed to this. Instead of sending dull recounts of my day, I try to work on my novel, which has made considerable progress since May thanks to my determined concentration on the matter at hand. I have noticed that some folks at work use time in the cafeteria to text, IM or tweet. I write. with a pen. How simplistic and old-school, right?
I also refuse to do anything other than the purpose for which a restroom was intended during bio breaks. I don’t take my cell with me, though occasionally I do hear people talking while pooing (ew) and wonder what could be so important that the call couldn’t wait for two minutes.
I look at Twitter like this: when a bird chirps in the woods, others hear it, but with so many people tweeting on Twitter, the noise overwhelms the forest and no one bird ever stands out or gets the chance to be truly heard.
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